I value love, responsibility and wisdom. Through education, focusing on personal development, I strive to empower people, particularly African-American youth. To uplift my community to break socio-economic cycles that has created a disparity in the standard of living in urban areas. I cannot create positive change in my environment without first taking care of myself and I will appreciate the vessel God has given me. Life is not a destination, but a journey and I will make thorough efforts to seek silver linings. I chose to not be negatively influenced by adversity and to look to the hills for help.
Am I currently living out my values? What do my values look like in action?
Knowledge/wisdom/truth/spirituality – 5
I gave myself a 5 here, because I could be doing more to educate myself formally, like pursuing a MA MFT or enrolling in a Clinical Psych program. I just feel like I’m not there yet, spiritually. I guess that test is on it’s way. Attending Bible Study and reading more philosophy and history books would be a good start.
Family – 8
There are members of my extended family that I would like to have a closer relationship with. I need to reach out to them and position myself to be of help when they are in need, but I think it’ll take more than a phone call or even a visit. Facebook, that’s it! I’ll flood them with game invites and tag them in all my pics!
Community – 5
I do service projects and donate a lil something something. I need to renew my membership in my neighborhood association and attend city council meetings to stay abreast of what’s going on. I need to donate more of my time.
Financial Security – 1
I can’t lie. I’m not doing enough here. Get a second job, save more and invest, consolidate school loans. All things I need to do ASAP.
Love – 10
All I can do is be lovable, the rest is up to someone else and I believe I’ve done that quite well. I love completely and hard, that’s got to count for something, right? Can’t say there’s a single person that I hate or even strongly dislike.
Advancement/progress/health – 5
Let’s see. I’m doing this 31 day life reset. It’s really helping me to organize my thoughts and outline my goals. I could eat better, move more, and care less.
Fellowship/laughter – 5
I can find the humor in almost everything, I’m always laughing. Just in case I can’t, I can always watch old episodes of Wipeout or It Only Hurts When I Laugh. Gotta explore the great outdoors and spend more time with the homies.
Responsibility – 10
I hold myself accountable for my actions, almost to a fault. I have no problem acknowledging when I’m wrong.
Peace – 7
I tend to worry a lot unnecessary, nothing a lot more me time can’t fix. I just need to spend a couple of spring days relaxing, gazing upon water and the sky (preferably from the shores of a beach resort) or slow dancing with myself at 9:00am on a weekday morning with the music blasting.
Creativity – 3
I admit. I’ve neglected my crafts and some are yet to be discovered. I used to be so heavy into graphic design. I kept it up for two years and never quite used it again. Never finished learning the piano either, I was too inpatient and never mastered reading music. I sing to myself all the time. No one ever tells me to shut up except my dad and sister (but they’re just hating) so I guess my voice is tolerable. Even if it isn’t, I’d still sing. I’ve always wanted to take up dance. Guess I should start looking up those
pole dancing Modern Dance classes. I never thought of myself as the creative type.
Today’s exercise was to name my values. I initially was making it more complicated than it really was. All I had to do was list 10 things that’s important to me. Here’s what’s important to me.
- Knowledge/wisdom/truth/spirituality – I can’t explain this. It’s just who I am. It’s what I do. I’m always looking at the “why”s of everything, I enjoy it.
- Love – Love is a beautiful thing, when it’s mutual and unconditional. I love love and I love being in love
- Community – These are my brothers and sisters too. We need to adopt a mind-set that when one succeeds we all can. If one is down, we all should try to lift that person up.
- Financial security – Money provides more choices. Choices offer freedom.
- Advancement/personal growth & developement
- Responsibility – one of the things I’m most passionate about. When people voluntarily take on responsibilities and then choose to neglect it just pisses me off. Especially, with children.
- Fellowship/laughter/good times
- Creativity – expression is essential.
Lifestyle: I love that I have a routine during week and free time on the weekends. It gives me something consistent to look forward to and free time for me to chill or be spontaneous. I love my hometown, but I feel boxed in. I hate that I don’t have my own and that my activities aren’t more diverse.
Work: I’m glad that I have a job to begin with. There are so many people who have families and because of the
selfish, greedy, rich wealth seekers economy they can’t provide for them. I get to make a positive difference in the lives of adolescents. I’d do that for free. It is disappointing when clients aren’t ready for change; I understand that not everyone wants to be saved. I do not work in the capacity I would like to work in. I don’t like being limited to administrative projects. I want to do it all, to be a part of a treatment team and make programmatic decisions. The program I work with now has a lot of potential, but it’s very stressful. It’s lacks space, resources, knowledgeable staff, and structure. In short, I’m overworked, over qualified, and underpaid.
Education: I’m a student of life. I love that I graduated college. I love that I never contemplated changing my major. There are so many skills I want to learn, but I’m limited because of my lifestyle and finances. I hate that I didn’t push myself harder. I hate that I procrastinated and was not as focused as I should have been. I would have liked study at a different institution at some point, preferably a HBCU.
Finances: I have money coming in and I have not touched my savings. I don’t have to rely on anyone to have my basic needs met. However, the money coming in is not enough. I hate my income-to-debt ratio. I hate that I haven’t managed money properly in the past and now I’m literally paying for it. Oh, how I have learned!
Health: I’m in sound mind and I’m in good health. I desire to be more spiritual. What I don’t like is not being able to get a good night’s sleep, not feeling rested and my body fat percentage. I’m currently investigating how much of that is in my control. Wish I was consistent with nutrition and exercise. In a nutshell, I literally and figuratively feel like I’m trapped in a clear box on stage in front of an audience. I feel like I’ve been fighting with weights on, trying to get out of the box. I’m exhausted.
Family: I have good relationships with my parents and sister. I was raised well and I’m grateful for that. I feel loved and respected by all my family. I’m ready to start a family, but I’m not ready, ready. I’m not stable enough. I don’t have all the things needed to start a family. What do I hate? – That some of my family have chosen to live their lives in ways that burden others. That some of my family take on some much of others’ burdens that it becomes them. They are consumed by it. However, I’ve accepted that I can’t change them and perhaps I can lead by example.
Relationships: I’ve established lasting relationships with good, supportive, goal-oriented people with a sense of humor, common interests and outlook on life. Others, I haven’t and I battle with it. I can’t let it go. I hate that I wasted valuable time, resources, and energy in situations where I should have just kept it moving.
In spite, I am blessed. Life is good.
“Life is a process of becoming, a combination of states we have to go through. Where people fail is that they wish to elect a state and remain in it. This is a kind of death.” — Anais Nin
I can’t stay here. Here is killing me. It’s time for a shift and I can’t look back. I have to position myself to receive what God has in store for me.